Nike's new NBA uniform release should have Celtics fans horrified

Generally speaking, I’m not a big fan of critics rushing to dump on anything new, as often seems to be the case. It’s easy to hate on change, and we see it happen every single year with new uniforms across all sports. We all pile on and disavow whatever new jerseys the NBA rolls out each year, often a thinly veiled excuse to sell more merch.

I try to play devil's advocate and be a voice of reason, preaching patience and acceptance, and willing myself to talk myself into various alternates, city editions, and whatever other iterations we’ve seen of the classic Boston Celtics threads over the years.

Nike dropped the ball with Celtics "Specter Edition" jerseys

But this latest release has gone too far, even for me. On Wednesday night, Nike revealed its new “Specter Edition” jerseys for the coming season, which will honor eight historic franchises: the Celtics, Knicks, Lakers, Pistons, Warriors, 76ers, Hawks, and Kings, with details inspired by history, heritage, and culture.

And let me tell you something. They are an atrocity.

I don’t care what they are supposed to honor and represent; these uniforms are hideous, and the idea that we have to watch the Celtics wear them is horrifying. Boston’s jerseys are dark, almost black, with green waves coursing through them. 

They look like something the Slytherin Quidditch team would wear in the Harry Potter series.

Like I said, I’m not a hater. I’m really not. I thought the white and gold last year was okay. I embraced the giant goofy cursive font a few years ago. The banner jerseys grew on me. But these are something else, and I just can’t imagine ever coming around on them.

You want to get creative and mess with jerseys for the Pelicans, the Wizards, the Grizzlies? Sure, go ahead (No disrespect!). But the Celtics are an iconic franchise with legendary uniforms. There is zero reason to mess with them in the first place, but if you are going to, at least make them look nice.

Who is asking for these repulsive uniforms?

Nike has completely missed the mark with this iteration, and I can only hope we don’t have to see them very often this season. None of the teams have announced when they plan to actually don these new threads, so hopefully, they’ll be dusted off for some random preseason game, never to be seen again.

Sadly, I highly doubt that’s the case, and I expect they’ll be mixed in for big games against the other seven teams with Specter jerseys. So, in other words, we’ll probably have a big, marquee game poisoned by a disgusting aesthetic experience. Great.

Alas.

At the end of the day, it’s merely a costume to be worn by my favorite basketball team. I don’t have to like it, but as long as the players can perform, that’s all that matters. Who knows? Maybe they’ll become a good luck charm, and this will be the next iconic installment of Celtics green! I’m not holding my breath. But I may be covering my eyes.

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